Letter to Little Miss.

9:07 PM

My darling daughter Jocelyn.

     We made bread today, you and I.  You helped me measure in the ingredients, and only spilled a little.  You turned on the mixer, even at times I wasn't expecting, and you wore an apron just like mama.  We put the dough into the pans together, you and I, and then tucked them in to let them rise before baking.

  I think it was actually just as wonderful as I imagined it would be.  Realizing that all you really want to do is whatever it is that I'm doing.  Better than your toys, better than your Connect Four game or Memory, is just being up on a chair in the kitchen, next to mama. 



   You spanked the dough to make it "be good" just like Grandma Smucker taught mama.  You were so intent, so determined, as you worked.  I could tell you felt so big and important as you focused on the task at hand.  

   Who am I?  That I would be given the honor...the privilege of being the person that you, my tiny dreamer, wants to be just like?  The question is not whether or not you are worthy to fill my shoes...the question my dear, is are my shoes worth filling?  Sometimes I don't know if they are.  But you keep looking, up, up, up at me with all the questions of the world in your eyes, and you are waiting for me to answer them.  Not someone else better than me, smarter than me, nicer than me.....ME. 

  And so it is with a heavy sense of responsibility that I will take up the torch, and try and lead.  I am so afraid that I will fail you.  On second thought, I am human, so I KNOW I will fail you.  But I just pray that when you look up at me, you will see reflections of Christ, because on my own I am not enough.  Not even close.  

   Please little soul, don't ever stop dreaming.  Even if I fall short of your expectations one day, don't ever give up.  I want you to fly at life with that fire, that drive, that you apply to so many, many things. Like baking bread. I don't want you to tiptoe into life.  Not you, my little Joss.  Tip-toeing might save you a few bumps and bruises, but you won't get to go a lot of places, or experience so many different things, either. 

Thank-you for today, my love.  I will treasure it always.

 -Your mama.

  


  

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2 comments

  1. AnonymousJanuary 11, 2013 at 1:50 PM

    Shelly, this was so good! I keep thinking the same things about Jada. Truth be told we were not made to be perfect cause if we were than there would be no need for Jesus. We are simply to repent when we sin and ask for forgiveness from our Children and then point them to Jesus...We can never be perfect with them because there is only one perfect person, Jesus. When we own up to our failures with our children they wont grow up with an illusion that they can do this thing on their own, they will have a real example of dependency on Jesus...if we don't quite we win...each day we sign up again to be examples... we mimic the One we know...

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    1. UnknownJanuary 12, 2013 at 1:36 PM

      "When we own up to our failures with our children they won't grow up with an illusion that they can do this thing on their own, they will have a real example of dependency on Jesus." -- Beautifully put! I couldn't agree more.

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