Honesty, and a bunch of cute grandkids.

7:42 AM

   Over the past few days, I've attempted to write a few blog posts.  One made it to a draft and no further, which probably was a good thing.  One made it to being published, but then I ended up taking it down.  It just felt too vulnerable.  I was being open and honest and transparent with some of my feelings/struggles as of late, and I guess I was just afraid that someone might abuse that.  So I took it down.

   People tend to translate posts like that as either a cry for attention or a call for help, and sometimes it's neither.  Sometimes it's just trying to be real for a moment.    
   But I struggle with the decision to take it down, because I want people to know that life is not always a bowl of cherries. Blogs tend to be somewhat of a highlight reel and none of the "behind-the-scenes" and I just want to be REAL.  Iam always so encouraged when other bloggers share their humanity, like this time that Naomi Davis shared about being in "survival mode".  I mean, if SHE can find herself stuck in that zone of just trying to get through the day, then surely there is hope for us mere mortals!  Or does that mean that if she can struggle that there ISN'T hope for the rest of us?  Sigh.  

   There is such a fine line (or maybe there isn't even a line...just a bunch of gray matter) between being too pessimistic, gloom-and-doom and an allover Eeyore in general....and being real. Being genuine, being honest.  I strive to be the latter but then what do you do when there's a little black raincloud hovering over you for a while?  Say nothing?  Remain silent?  Gloss it all over a bit before hitting "publish"?  I guess I haven't figured all of that out yet.  So for now, you can just enjoy some old pictures taken back this summer of the Smucker grandkids.  I know, it has nothing to do whatsoever with this post, but I have been wanting to post them for a long time, and just recently got the cd, so here they are!

All photography by Ruth Swartzendruber.

   We are truly blessed with wonderful in-laws and family out here.  With most of my family far away, it is such a huge help and support to have a Grandma and Grandpa near that my children adore, and I never worry a bit that they are in excellent hands when I need to leave them.  Not to mention that these little ones are going to have SO much fun growing up with so many cousins close to their age.  In my childhood, my cousins were some of my VERY BEST friends and we made the absolute greatest memories, so I am so excited to watch these friendships grow and develop. 

   Right now we might be working on the whole "playing nicely" concept, but I can envision sleepovers, treehouse explorations, tea parties, fort building, and all sorts of lovely times in their future.  I am thankful for my families, both near and far.

    I'm off to Bible study in an hour and I can't WAIT for a spiritual shot in the arm.  What are you up to on this foggy, hazy Thursday? 

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  1. I had been trying to read the redacted blog, so this explanation makes sense.

    It's easy for me to say "Hang in there, buckaroo!" but platitudes don't instantaneously solve struggles and hardships that you're facing. I hope that the rest of this week goes fantastically well for you!

  2. when you get the whole honesty//being real thing figured out let me know. Its somehow much easier to be real with total strangers then it is with people you know. hugs friend.

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  4. {sorry-messed up that first comment, will try again..}
    Amen, Shelley! I so know what you are saying-I struggle with the whole honesty thing/how much to post/not post, too. Thanks for the post. Its good to talk about these things! And your fellow-bloggers know exactly what you mean. (sympathy & understanding inserted here =))


  5. Just last night, I picked up 1,000 sub-buns @ Kalona Bakery, and being in charge of our fund raiser, i was exhausted. I took them to school, and i was sure they made them from frozen bread dough and were nothing like the 15 previous years. I wanted to call her up & tell her what I thought, but I didn't, and this morning my family said they are delicious Mom what was your problem. They were right they were delic. So if you think you need a few days, to cool off before making comments, believe me it's worth it rather than saying your sorry, and ruining friendships. ( How saten enjoys when we have our squabbles, it keeps us from using God's power to encourage others.) Mom

  6. Wanting to be honest about real life on your blog, but not always knowing how to do it so that people hear what you're trying to say? Do I ever get that. For what it's worth, I love your space here. It is a place that is positive and honest and real.


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