Corn stalks and wedding bells.

3:10 PM

Here I am again.

    I love the familiar feel of the keys beneath my fingers. i think I appreciate it more now that I hardly ever get the chance to post than when I could whenever I wanted.  My cup of coffee sits to my right, tepid and lukewarm because I never get a chance to drink it all while it's hot.  Jocelyn is to my left, busy with her crayons.  Charlotte sleeps, snuggled soundly in a Moby wrap across my chest.  Finally, a moment to write.

   Each time after returning from Iowa, I brood for a while.  Not so much with homesickness, but with thoughts...did I take the time to connect?  Were they blessed by me?  Burdened?  I think of my family and friends, trying to remember if I took the time to listen and hear their hearts.   I keep thinking of things I wish I would've been able to talk to people about.  Nicole-blogging.  Grandma-church stuff.  Elaine-balancing busy-ness with motherhood. Aunt Jana-writing. Sharon-life in general.  Jewel-pregnancys. Heidi-motherhood. Retta-moving. Merlene and Linz-dating life. Janene-everything, as we only got little snippets here and there. Mom and Dad-lots of stuff. But it's ok.  The time spent with people was precious, and not long enough, but then it never is.  It's just something I will have to get used to.

    Travel went better than expected for the most part, with Charlotte sleeping during the flights and Jocelyn both sleeping and playing well.  There was just one major poop catastrophe, in which I was caught unprepared and without a spare set of clothes for Joss, which explains the lack of pants in the picture.  But even if I had been prepared for Joss, I wouldn't have had a spare set for Randy, who was holding her during aforementioned catastrophe.  He bought a Broncos t-shirt for an exorbitant amount in the airport, and we made it the rest of the way without any more major disasters.  I can't wait until I have at least one potty-trained child!

   On Thursday night, we celebrated Janene's last remaining days of singlehood with a bachelorette party in downtown Iowa City.  This poor mommy is obviously not accustomed to nights out on the town, because the entire evening I felt grossly unprepared.  Why you ask?  Well, for starters, I was wearing a dress that was NOT nursing-friendly.  It was a slip-on style with a belt, and had a high neckline.  The worst part is, I didn't even think about it.  We were gathered at Janene's house ready to leave when one of the other bridesmaid's said, "How are you going to nurse in that dress?"  *Cue sinking feeling like you're slowly melting into a puddle of goo.*  I couldn't believe I had pulled such a brainless stunt since I am a mother of TWO and should have these things figured out by now, but then I remembered.  When I was packing for the trip, I was planning on leaving Charlotte with mom.  What I didn't plan on, was being so busy that day I would not have time to pump, and end up taking Charlotte with me.  Hence the non-nursing-friendly attire.  Dumb idea #1.

Dumb idea #2, was wearing these shoes.
   Words that come to mind when describing these shoes?
  • Beautiful.
  • Classy. 
  • Elegant. 
  • Deadly. 
 I am not exaggerating, they are, bar none, the most uncomfortable excruciatingly painful shoes I have ever owned.  "Why did you wear such awful shoes?" You ask.  (Boy you sure ask a lot of nosy quesions)  As a mother of two little ones, I just don't get to go shopping a lot these days, so I decided to wait until I was in Iowa to shop for shoes when I had my mom to babysit.  Well, the week was jam-packed so of course that left very little time for leisurely shoe shopping, and by the time I frantically grabbed these up,(a couple hours before the bachelorette party) there was no going back.  And Oh. My. Lanta. did I pay dearly for it.
   Dumb idea #3, was not having a stroller along.  Once again, I am a mom of TWO and I still don't have this figured out?!  Calling all moms of 3+, does it get better?  Pleeeease tell me it does! Once again, I remember what I was thinking.  I thought, oh, I'll just carry her in her car seat into the restaurant and back out again, no big deal.  But I neglected to think about the fact that Vermosa was DOWNTOWN.  You know, where you often have to park far away and walk a long distance?  And then walk yet another long distance to the cupcakerie?  AND while wearing suicidal heels?!  ANNNND while trying to carry a baby in a car seat and a diaper bag that weighs about as much as I do?!!!  Man, even thinking back on it I just about break out in hives.  Thankfully, people took pity on me in my pitiful state, and helped carry the baby and diaper bag, and all the while, I was limping along in my pathetic heels, mentally kicking myself for wearing them and wanting to vow to never wear them again, but they're too expensive not to! Sigh.  I'm still not sure which took a beating worse, my feet or my pride.

  In spite of my stupidity, it was a fun evening.  We enjoyed sushi and cupcakes and I just loved seeing Janene so dolled up, glowing, and having a fabulous time.  I just wished I had prepared a little better so I could have really enjoyed the evening better. 

  The wedding of course, was lovely.  DIY details, vintage charm, and Janene's personal style were stamped everywhere you looked.  Accents of plum and grass green brought color to her otherwise neutral palate.  Burlap and glass, crystal and lace were elements used to create one of the most beautiful receptions I have ever been to.  And the bridal table was just fantastic.  An old wooden dining table with mismatched wooden chairs had us all sitting family style, passing around food and laughing and talking.  It was one of the most relaxing bridal tables EVER.  None of this, sit-in-a-long-line-so-everyone-can-watch-you-chew-in-silence stuff. 

   Here we are, mere moments before the ceremony was set to begin.  She was so calm, filled with peace and beauty.  She was an absolute vision in her dress, and her hair and makeup were simply breathtaking.  Kate Middleton's got nothin' on her. ;)
   My darling Jocelyn was a flower girl, and it made me so sentimental to think of her being in weddings now as a flower girl, later, a bridesmaid, and someday, a bride.  *weep*

   She walked with Decklin, just the sweetest little boy in town and he did such a great job of trying to stay brave for her.  He had a slight meltdown right before the time came to walk down the aisle, with neither mommy or daddy in sight, but then he calmed down, and walked like a pro.  Jocelyn, on the other hand, stopped, and pulled up her dress to hide her face from all the people staring at her.  She never did make it all the way down the aisle, but that's alright with me.  I'm not quite ready for her to glide effortlessly and gracefully down aisles any time soon.  Stay my little toddling darling, won't you please?

   It was a beautiful day, from start to finish.  It held so much emotion and joy and wonderful people, I would do it all over again if it didn't mean wearing those shoes.  (Notice how I am in flip flops by reception time)
   It was also wonderful to see family, and have more of the Grabers meet our little Charli.  Who knows how big she'll be by the time we go back again, I have a feeling it won't be for a while. :(  Travel just becomes more difficult and expensive, and I'm afraid our trips will become fewer and farther between. 

   It was good to go, but it is great to be back.  Now our garden/house/laundry is in a state of disarray and general upheaval, and it's going to take a bit of elbow grease to get it all running smoothly again.  (I say as I sit at my computer) 

That's all for now, folks. 

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  1. Oh Shelley I just love your blogs and how relaxed you are when you right them. I laughed out loud a couple times reading this post. I wasn't expecting to or trying to but i simply couldn't hold it in on some unexpected points. Oh man, this sounds like a trip to remember!!!! I was a flower girl at 3 and i cried almost all the way down (not to mention run back out the door) and let's just say people really remember that. Oh, sometimes it feels like life is just a huge joke :)

  2. shelley reading this amused me. i was struck by how much harder we moms are on ourselves than we should be. i never ONCE thought of you as being stupid the night of the bachelorette party. i felt sorry for you, but you should not feel dumb!! as for your keep your head up high girl! you are a great mommy and i must say...a GORGEOUS woman. wish i looked half as classy and amazing as you. i know not one of us minded helping you with your little charlotte. she's a dearie. believe me...i've been there too. now you wanna talk about feeling dumb...i have been kicking myself ever since the wedding for not planning better for what to do with natalie thru the ceremony. the fact that my poor sister missed the whole thing just bugs me to no end. but moms gotta stick together and we all need to give ourselves a break!!

  3. your "did I take time to connect" thoughts are so me! I do it almost every time after I've been home! LOVED your blog, once again. And I am quite certain nobody else thought of the "mishaps" quite in the same light you did, or probably not at all! :) You're lovely, and your little flower girl is just precious!

  4. Aw so many happy memories and I can't express my delight enough that you were able to be a part of them all. I hope your feet have recovered :) miss you. Xox.


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