Choosing our influences.

3:51 PM

   I'm slowly but surely learning about what it means to "choose your friends carefully".  My mom would always say that to me, and I always brushed it off as ridiculous nonsense, and still do somewhat, I guess.  I would always think, "Everyone is fine, Mom, and even if they're not, I can't just seclude myself in this little, protective bubble forever."

   But now that we're a little bit past slumber parties and braces and high school, teenage life, that whole concept takes on a new meaning for me.  It applies to people in real life, obviously, but I think it also applies to our "online friends".  People that we have perhaps never met and never will, but we still form a sort of friendship with through blogs and Instagrams and Pinterest and so on and so forth.  Even if they truly don't know we exist....when we are reading their deepest thoughts and viewing pictures of their children, style, home and life, it endears us to them in a sort of fashion as one would with a real, live, breathing friend.  And as one begins to form these alliances of sorts, these so-called friendships, it also bears a lot of influence on our thoughts, feelings, tastes and desires.

   Just think about it.  Before the internet, who did we even care about?  The people we actually KNEW.  The ones that we had a relationship with, flesh and blood, and would actually see and hear and encounter. 

   But now?  NOW there's an entire UNIVERSE on the internet that for some reason, we have to somehow impress.  Somehow, we are supposed to be charming to people we've never even seen, and have this amazing sense of fashion, all the while being held up next to runway models and people who buy clothing from the highest end fashion lines, and not Goodwill.  Our house is supposed to look like Pottery Barn and our kids are supposed to look like they stumbled out of a crewcuts ad campaign, even if they're potty training and teething and fighting a cold and growing out their bangs.  There is no mercy when comparing yourself to the online world, because online, there is always someone better, prettier, fancier, amazing-er.  

    P.S. Just go ahead and ignore the baby drool on my sleeve......on second thought, don't ignore it.  Take a good, long look at its sticky grossness.  That's something you don't see very often on the internet, a bit of reality.   Life of a mom, folks.  Get used to it. 

   Dressing your kids nicely? Having a pretty home?  Those are things that we can aspire to in our own, small ways, and there is no problem in that.  But comparing yourself to the entire, wide world web and beyond and hoping to be able to keep up in every way?  Arts, crafts, music, fashion, decor, style, cooking, vacations?  It's just not feasible in this life or the next.  And we must remember, we are ALWAYS comparing our weaknesses with other people's strengths.  We've lost before we've begun. 

   So why do we even try?  What drives us to perform in these areas of life?  Well, I don't know what it is for you all, but I'm starting to figure out what it is for me. For me, it is the "friends" that I choose, and have chosen.  Blogs that I faithfully read, that slowly but surely turn my focus towards things like fashion, decor, and the latest and greatest baby gear.  Frankly I'm getting a little burned out on it all.

   I want to start reading some blogs that take me back to what matters most.  WHO matters most.  I want blogs that challenge me to faithfully read my Bible, as faithfully as I would peruse Etsy for the perfect sock doll.  I want a blog that inspires me to pray more, as much as one might inspire me to try color-blocking in my wardrobe.  I want a blog that reminds me to turn to Jesus and discover more and more of Who He is, much like one might remind me to be a little more adventurous in my cooking and  home decor.  Do you know of some blogs that do that?  If so, please share them with me.  I need a little bit more of that influence in my life right now.  And maybe a little less Pinterest.  ;)

You Might Also Like


  1. this one issooooooooooooooooo good!

  2. O. my. Kick in the pants day. I have been... floundering a bit. I read your post, then scrolled through my reader. Dear Lord, I must put some tooth to this thing. Adoption stories, real food recipes and Miss Mustard Seed alone are not going to inspire me to grow.

    These will all make you think...

  3. this is really really good. and i so agree with you.
    some time ago i made the same decision,to be super choosy with which blogs i read.
    partly because of time's sake, with little kids,
    but also because *I* can't handle the pressure.
    some blogs just have a certain *feel* to them that makes me feel like i'm compared and don't match up.
    and others have such a refreshing spirit, like liquid grace poured out,
    that encourage me as a wife, a mom, a woman.

    a few that i love are

    Have a lovely day! :)

  4. Came back to see who else was suggested and realized I made 2 mistakes on mine.

  5. I have numerous ones that I like but these are my favorites: (Ann Voskamp) (Sally Clarkson)

    May you see Jesus in your day today! :)

  6. Wonderful post. Currently I feel a bit overwhelmed with the whole online world. blogging, reading blogs, commenting on blogs, Facebooking, messaging, commenting, reading FB, all gets to be a bit much. This was a good reminder to focus on the best of the best. A few years ago I deleted a LOT of blogs from my reader, and didn't let myself bookmark them. I thought that if I truly missed them I'd remember them well enough to find them again. Remarkably, I only missed a few. I've checked in now and then, but that satisfies me while taking much less time.

    Here are a few blogs I find inspirational:

  7. Here's a few of my favorites. I started following both of these while living in Thailand, mostly because I was so inspired to find other missionaries out there who loved Jesus and were passionate about following him.

  8. thanks for this great post. what a good reminder! i posted it on my FB page because i think we all need to stop and think about how much time we waste reading pointless things.

    this is one i love... what better thing to read about than how to make our marriage grow each day:

    thanks for your encouraging thoughts.

  9. Love this post. So true. I have a blog where I seek to share spiritual truths.

    You can find it at

  10. I never comment, but love reading your blog! The main blog I regularly follow is I find it very inspiring both spiritually and of my all-time favorites! Thanks for all your great posts!


Like us on Facebook

Flickr Images