The Green Monster.

9:45 PM

  Contrary to what the title might lead you to believe, I am not talking about the Hulk.  Or the Grinch, or the Jolly Green Giant that advertises canned corn.  Or the Sinclair dinosaur, the funny one-eyed guy from Monster's Inc., or the Loch Ness Monster.  Man, there really are a lot of green ones, aren't there?  Assuming that the LNM is green, but that's what I've always pictured it as....moving on.

   I am talking about jealousy.  Someone please tell me that I'm not the only person that struggles with this, even if you're just humoring me.  I think even a lie would comfort me a little at this point. "You, jealous?!! But why?! You have such a perfect life!!"  Why thank-you, and I do have a perfect wonderful life.  But that's not really the point.  Newsflash, but Satan doesn't really take into consideration how beautiful your life is before deciding what to tempt you with.  It's not like he takes one look at your life and goes, "Shucks.  She's got an amazing husband, beautiful daughter and lovely home.  I got nothin'."  He's a little smarter than we give him credit for, people.  He can strike anyone, anytime, and anywhere, and it doesn't really matter if you're living in a penthouse or on a park bench, jealousy can happen even to you.

   So here are just a few things that rouse up that ugly, green pest these days.

  1. Blog envy.  I have long touted the opinion that cool, talented, amazing blogs are not the CAUSE OF JEALOUSY.  I cannot stress this enough.  Swearing off reading blogs will not cure your jealousy, because there will always be something in life (your great aunt's cooking, so-and-so's home/car/pool, etc) to peak your jealousy.  No, my friends, there are no magic words to say to make it disappear.  It is something we have to each individually conquer in our own lives.  THAT BEING SAID, even though I am still a fierce proponent of the opinion that blogs don't MAKE us jealous, I will admit to slipping up occasionally and feeling jealous after reading one.  Like this one, who blogs about her baby yawning, and gets 121 comments.  I'm not kidding.  In fact, she doesn't have to write anything at all.  She puts up no more than a single photo and the comments come rolling in by the hundreds.  What is up with that?  And while we're talking about her, (sorry, not trying to target her specifically, she's just a perfect example of this next one) we'll roll right on into #2.
  2. Those women that materialize into their former selves mere moments after giving birth.  This is what she looks like 5 weeks post-baby.
   Holy macaroni, she's smokin'!  And it seemed so effortless.  But I'm sure she wouldn't say that.  Or maybe she would....

3. Those super-decorators. You know who I'm talking about.  The ones that, approximately 7.5 hours after the Thanksgiving turkey has been consumed and is still digesting, they have their tree up, garlands gracing the halls, festive wreath and stockings hung, and a dazzling array of Christmas lights that flash in sync to the Little Drummer Boy.

4.  Great gift-givers.  This time of year (and throughout the year around birthdays) I am constantly reminded that gift-giving is not my gift. Pun intended.  I have to work hard at finding the "right thing" for someone, when some people could walk blindfolded into a Dollar General and come out with something that is just perfect.

5. People who love to cook and clean.  I like it, don't get me wrong.  I enjoy a clean house and I feel so accomplished when I make a great meal, but I don't love it.  I'm just not there yet.  I want to be.  I hope to be one day.  But it just doesn't come to me naturally, like those that can't keep their fingers out of the cupboards baking goodies or off of the shelves dusting from the sheer delight of it.

  I could go on, but I'm sure some people think it's nigh-on to sinful to admit that you're jealous.  O.k. so I will agree, the Bible tells us not to covet, but it doesn't say that when you're feeling covetous you can't confess it.  So there it is, I am being honest, open and real, and making myself quite vulnerable, in the hopes that A. I am not completely alone, and B. I can/will change.  

   I love my life.  I have been blessed so many, many times with so many incredible things.  I never, ever want to take any of that for granted.  These are just some areas in which I am tempted to feel a little...well...jealous.  The "J" word is scary.  No one wants to use it because it will somehow make them feel like less of a person, when reality is, we all feel it, but we just want to appear as that one person who doesn't.  Well, I guess tonight is a night where I'm not pretending.

Enjoy it while it lasts. :-p

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  1. And here I thought you were going to blog about a Christmas tree being Jocelyn's "green monster"! Ha! Just saw the photo you put on Facebook, so naturally what did I think when I saw the title for this blog post? :-)


  2. You are not the only one who struggles with this!!! Jealousy is one of my struggles too! Thank you for posting this and being real and honest!
    Something that sometimes helps me is to realize that God made me who I am and not someone else, and He made me completely different from someone else, so comparing myself to them really doesn't (or shouldn't) work. If He wanted me to be someone else, He would have made me them and not me...

  3. Just started following via B* Pretty.. :) Loved this blog!! You are definitely NOT the only one! This seems to be more evident in women. My husband just doesn't understand. Lol. Lord, grant us grace in our trials!!!! :)

  4. You are not alone and I love reading your blog. I've probably peeked at it at lest monthly the last year and sometimes more. I've just never commented. But if it's hundreds of comments you want then I will start.

  5. Lol!! You are adorable Shelley! My sisters and I still think of you as 'that gorgeous girl in the orange dress at Nicole's wedding.'. holy macaroni smokin hot.

    Great reminders and thank you for your honesty!!

  6. Oh so true! Do you think this is the female "thing" that we have to fight? I know I do! I used to be so jealous when my girlfriends got to go out on a hot date with their husbands, no matter how lame it might really be, because I wasn't the one going out. I'm fighting that jealousy by commenting, on facebook or wherever, about how happy I am that they get to go out. And it's true! I am so much happier doing that than I am making a snarky little comment about how I wish I could go out too....

  7. So agree! Most of those things make me jealous, as well as people who look so put together all the time and people who are fabulous couponers! This is a struggle I think everyone can relate to, if we are all honest! Keep up the posts, Shelley!
    Amanda Miller

  8. I was just recently prompted by God that I've got secret little areas of jealousy hiding in my life, Shells. So I'm right there with ya.

    I can't say I'm jealous of that young woman in (2). That trendy belt is carving into her sides. She probably has one of those 1600-era corsets on, too. And she's holding her breath. Besides, you look awesome. I'm wider than you and I've never had a baby. :)

  9. Some of the things you mentioned made me think of this. I remember when I was a kid, my Dad was assigned a sermon on "Thou shalt not covet." In casual conversation beforehand, someone mentioned covetousness in a sense as always being bad. Dad mentioned 1 Cor. 12:31, "But covet earnestly the best gifts." So maybe what specifically we covet and why we covet it may factor into things.

  10. I love reading your blog just never commented! So keep it up!!!! I agree about jealousy....I have to say tho I don't know why you are jealous of that lady... you look really great yourself! :-) Jerin

  11. Jealousy bites all of us. I think part of the problem ok, most of the problem is how we as women compare ourselves with other woman. Isn't it more of our inferiorities surfacing as we feel like we will never be able to "measure up to this person" I think it's helpful to me to recognize that their are others for sure that would be jealous of my giftings. To somehow :-) remember that God gifts us all differently for a reason. Blogs may not "make" us jealous but they have a way of bringing out the worst in us sometimes. Because on a blog you can appear to have it all together. People don't often post pics when there houses are messy, etc. Maybe that's why your blog along with others are my favorite because they show honest reality, and I love that. Oh, and just so you know I've found myself feeling a little jealous of how beautiful and fit you were and still are even after having a baby ;-) There confession is good for the soul. lol

  12. good words dear.

    and seriously. i've totally thought that about sydney's blog too. :)


  13. shelley, u give the BEST PRESENTS EVER!!!!!!!!
    or at least thats what shane,shaylon and me think. :)
    love you ever so much, sheryl

  14. I'm not quite sure why I wasn't included in the previous comment, but I think you give amazing presents too, Shells. Thanks for coming out to visit us!


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